By: Ika Dwi Meilani
Bright morning adorning, coloring two weeks of the birth of my sister. The sound of crying broke the silence that time. In front of the room emerge a soft figure is lying weak, somehow. What is happening? I thought uneasy. When I approach her, the wistful eyes, a pale face is clearly displayed. It was my mother, the figure of a woman who firmly facing problems, a strong woman who was not careless in looking after and taking care of her four children. One day, my baby sister’s cry continued to pounce. At that time my father’s formidable figure handled him, holding my brother and putting on a confused face.
“Father, why do you look so worried?” I asked.
“Look (towards my sister), she have cried in your mother’s arms all day,” answered my father.
With the spryness of my father, he moved my sister to the living room away from my mother. Immediately my sister was quiet and even gave the moon a sleep on her face. Give a special impression to me who was accompanied him that time. My father was amazed at her expression. Why so? In the arms of her own mother she cried, but quiet immediately after being apart, my father said.
“Give the bottle to your sister,” said that tough man.
Actually I do not deserve to give bottle milk to a 2 week old baby but there is no other way for him to suckle because he cannot suckle to the mother. A beautiful smile appeared on her lips when I teased her with a simple toy. Meanwhile, I don’t know how is Mother in the room where my sister was born. Whether she’s good? or even the opposite? Hopefully nothing happens that could make this heart recess hurt.
Then my next door neighbor came over. Maybe the sound of crying a little baby, was heard “Waaa…Waaa….” because of bedwetting. Mrs. Halimah, my neighbor, immediatelly changed my sister’s diaper because i was 8 years old and did not understand the matter of a small baby.
“Mrs. Halimah will go home, Nduk, look after your sister well,” said my neighbor.
“Yes, ma’am. Thank you, ma’am, “I replied.
After that the mother’s condition worsened.
“Well, I’m dizzy,” my mother said in a groaning tone.
“Well, just take a rest,” replied father, holding my sister.
Then for the second time, my sister was brought closer to mother with the good intentions so that my sister would be breastfed so that my sister’s growth would improve. But my sister showed the same refusal. Why is this? Why is my sister crying? I asked in my heart. I show the same confusion as my father’s. Quickly my father went out to borrow a neighbor’s car and took my mother to the hospital. Precisely at Aisyiyah Hospital Malang Suddenly neighbors came to see how my mother and my sister were being moved to the neighbor’s house. Anxiously is shown on all the faces of my neighbors including me while waiting for news from my father.
Shortly after came news from my father that ….? But certainly I heard the news from the mouth of my neighbor that the thing that I feared the most happened. I don’t know why I just paused, stunned to hear that statement. The statement like lightning struck a tree endlessly. I shed all the feelings of resentment, pain, and anger in the rain water that I produced myself.
~~
After that, I ran to pick up my sister who was at school, at that time she was walking home. With a gasping breath and rain water that continues that comes out of the engine.
“Why? What is wrong?” my sister who was confused asked.
“Mother, Sis, Mother …,” his sister said.
I stammered this news to my sister and the condition of my mouth is like a stiff statue, it is not reasonable, but i insist forced it. Hold an endless crying that the scary thing is like being engulfed in the earth, it was gone without a trace. My mother left me and all of her family who were in dire need of a strong woman in managing the household. In the middle of that, the rain continued to flow on the two machines of the sibling. I do not know whether it can be contained or not because immediately my soul seemed to disappear from the earth. I was like drifting without direction and without clues.
~~
The wall clock shows 13:30. My father suddenly came up with a perplexed and confused face. In less than a minute of my father’s arrival, a voice sounded like an announcement from a mosque near my home, “Innalillahi wainnalillahiraji’un 3 × has died the wife of Mr. Ahmad is Mrs. Likah in … … “. My heartbeat seemed to stop for a split second when I heard those words.
“At 3:00 p.m., an ambulance came to take my mother,” my father said.
“Yes, please prepare the equipment for the bath,” I replied.
Without realizing that time is running fast, the wall clock shows 14:45. Before long an ambulance sounded was heard, “Wee woo…Wee woo…”, stopped right in front of my house. I just halt to hear a white car with a red and blue light on it, and it said “Ambulance Jenazah”. Without a blink of an eye, I didn’t let my guard down to see a movement in that moving machine. When it was opened a black cloth covered the laying of a formidable woman, my mother. Shortly after, the gurgling of water with the flowers fell on the woman’s body, cleansing her body until there was not a single impurities. She was holy, she was ready, and it seemed in front of me that a meaningful woman in each finger was dancing on a white paper that read ABCDE. In my mind i said, “My mother is very pale.”
~~
A few hours after that, the funeral process will be carried out after the baths and shrouded. I couldn’t watch the funeral process because tears kept flowing from the engine. It is hard for me to imagine, how would life in the future if there was no woman to take care of me. Whether it will be me as usual or even change? In the future without a mother who always gives encouragement when I’m almost desperate. Now there is no longer a formidable woman who teaches the meaning of life. I know, life in this world is only temporary but does it have to be this fast? Eight years I felt her love, eight years I was with her, and now eight years are just mere memories that can never be repeated.
Day after day I passed, 3 days, 7 days and even 40 days. I didn’t realize that time flies, and I have to continue this life even though it feels different now. Like a food that lack slat, the atmosphere of this house is no longer colored. Even so, this is my life whether there is a mother or not, I have to struggle to achieve dreams, to be proud of my father and mother. My father and mother are pilots and flight attendants who must work together in their field. The plane will not run without a pilot, so also a household must have an unusual irregularity where a father must be the backbone as well as ribs. But all that is God’s plan that we must live with sincerity as well as me, sincere in undergoing a spinning wheel even though the wheel does not roll perfectly. In life, certainly not going to run always smoothly, there are times when problems will come. It is called the color of life.
~~
The day continues, time continues to spin. Now I grew older and this heart was more willing to let her go. Go far away and never come back. My heart is getting organized, getting used to with a tough man, my father. Maybe not as perfect as my mother but my father tried to do it so that I feel comfortable even though i have no mother. Now I have been happy with my father who always provides motivation, support and encouragement. Always advise me to be a successful person in the future. Encouraging me to never give up facing a problem. His support was always felt at every step. “Come on! Beat the people there, so that you become successful! “That’s the support he always tells me. Those words always kept in my mind, it never occurred to me to erase the ultimatum.
~ The End ~
